LQDRP: The Rush This Degenerate Agriculturalist Didn’t Know He Needed
As the consequence of new year’s eve celebrations were running rampant across what was once coined the ‘most liveable city in the world’, one degenerate agriculturist took to the dark depths of the Fantom blockchain to get the dopamine rush he didn’t know he needed.
At 4:15 PM on the 5th of January, the Liquid Driver Print token ($LQDRP) was stealthily launched on the Dx Launchpad to a hungry herd of apes lurking in the project’s telegram chat. This was met by imminent cheers of excitement from all of them with one exclaiming “lets f**king go” before aping his hard-earned dollarydoos into what appeared to be -and could still be for all we know- a bloodsucking rug-pull.
Within an hour, these reckless degenerates had given the token a healthy start out of the blocks, amassing a market cap (MC) of $100,000 USD. This subsequently caught the attention of Twitter influencers such as @rektfoodfarmer who tweeted “I have no connection to the team, I do not know if they even have a website yet, but I aped” simply because it “has $LQDR in the name lol”. An admirable way to lead one’s followers into battle and feed their ‘passion for investing’, otherwise known as a borderline gambling addiction. Additionally, the Pad Kra Pao-loving farmer was joined by @RyukCalls and the self-proclaimed “sports betting expert/crypto coach”, @Mrbankstips who got in on a dip at $140,000 MC.
So what even is this speculative little token that’s leaching off the brand of one of the FTM ecosystem’s most exciting DeFi projects? Well get ready to acquaint yourself with the wild world of reflection tokens, where there are only two outcomes: “we sink, or… we swim” — @rektfoodfarmer. Essentially, every time a user trades the reflection token, a tax is taken, and holders are automatically rewarded for their ‘diamond hands’ through proportionately calculated dividend payouts sent directly to their wallet. In this instance, every time someone trades $LQDRP on SpookySwap, holders of the token are very generously rewarded with $LQDR. In saying that, it must be mentioned that the $LQDRP token has a total supply of one quadrillion… make of that what you will.
Alas, the scene has been set, so where does that degenerate agriculturalist -that was (and still is) locked up in the confines of his humble abode- fit into this? Well firstly, he’s run out of groceries and has been living off Uber Eats throughout his lonesome period of isolation… So as such, he was fiending for something stimulating enough to stop him from going on another soul-crushing 6-hour Tiktok binge. Aping in with 11% slippage (the tax), this degen went on an emotional rollercoaster full of adrenaline, despair, and of course, dopamine. At one stage he had 3x’d his small gambling stake… the next minute he was almost down and out (repeat x10) — the only way you should ever experience a newly minted layer-2 sh*tcoin with no website, no documents, and a sole dev. who ended up falling asleep.
Despite the urge to chase the ATH dragon, this lonely individual refused to be left behind and aggressively threw in the towel to lock in some tokenised happiness. Overall, it was a thoroughly enjoyable afternoon for this degenerate agriculturalist who survived the merciless wild west of the crypto space.
Note: At the time of writing this, $LQDRP is still somewhat alive, despite the dip in the market — trading at $0.000000000137 and with a market cap of $140,000 (down 52% in the last 24 hours).
